The confidence to request something is more of a challenge than done. There is always a sense of doubt particularly when it comes to asking for something valuable for yourselves. We all have doubts about our abilities and ask whether we really deserve it, whereas others are worried that the other person will not be able to understand what we are saying.
The self-doubt that you feel can be a result of many refusals to request something. So, how do you find the confidence or courage to request what you want? Here are some strategies to convince yourself and build up your confidence before asking.
It’s important to write it down
Are you looking for the best method to build your confidence up prior to asking for a raise. Write down your questions. Preparation is important when you want to build confidence before starting an uncomfortable or challenging conversation.
Writing down your thoughts will help you decide what words to choose and how to express them. This will assist you in overcoming your mental barriers and set the tone for the conversation.
Writing it down doesn’t simply require writing down your thoughts on paper. It is essential to make an organized plan of dialogues you need to say. So, you don’t stumble while speaking and won’t need to stop mid-sentence in order to find the correct words.
Choose the Best Time to Make a Request
Planning to yell at your pals when they step off the lift? This isn’t a great way to communicate and won’t get you the results that you want. Call your friends and set an appointment with them in the appropriate date and location.
Make sure to tell them that you’re going to talk about something important to ensure that they’re comfortable yet serious.
You’ll face more difficulties when you speak at a time that the other person isn’t in proper mindset and has lost focus. Or, they’ll not take your message seriously, or they’ll request you to come back another time. In the worst case scenario, they could confront you. If you want to inquire about something, make sure you pick the appropriate time.
Know the reason you are asking Before You Ask
Sometimes, we’re unable to be confident enough to request something since we aren’t sure what we’re looking for. The false belief that we’re able to live with it is often coupled with the notion that it is possible to request it. Others may believe that their desires and needs are so important that they should not inquire. You might feel the same way. Try understanding why you’re asking.
Create a rationale as to why it’s an important thing to do, and what it will do to make a difference to your daily life and then narrow down the reason you’re not asking. When you’ve got an answer to these questions, you’ll start building the confidence and motivation to inquire.
Once you’ve realized how important it is to inquire, you’ll be able to see the difference in your body language and how you talk.
Be specific when asking questions.
Many people make the error of making a fuss in hopes of getting the other person to be able to understand the issue they’re trying to convey. This not only leads to confusion however, you can also are left with nothing.
There is a high possibility that you don’t get what you want therefore, be specific when communicating. Communicate clearly in plain language using the correct language and tone. To see if they’re understanding you, observe their actions.
Take a look at the body language
Effective communication is based on the use of body language. If your conversation is precise and accurate, but your body language appears timid and confused, the other person may be unable to comprehend your point. When speaking, it’s crucial to convey your message with confidence using the body language you use.
Talking should be easy and relaxed. Make use of the right hand gestures and shut your mouth. Take the tension off your shoulders and let it go. Take a seat before beginning conversations if you’re feeling tired or uneasy standing.
Keep eye contact with the person you are talking to during the conversation to demonstrate that you are eager for to make them understand your message. The more confident you appear when you speak to someone else, the more efficiently you’ll be able to demonstrate your assertion.
Don’t Complain
“I have heard that Michael will be the next project manager, but it could be me. I’ve done many things for the company, but I was never treated with the respect that I have earned. It is only going to cause the person to be angry when you communicate in this way. Making a complaint about the situation can be a sign of negativity. It also limits your options, making the situation worse. Remember that complaining is not an option for people who are adults. You will come across as rude and unprofessional, and you will give the impression you don’t know the significance of the questions you ask.
Keeping the positive approach to everything and avoiding the “it is not fair” approach will inspire people to give you a chance and understand what you are seeking. Do not compare your situation with others , and don’t think negatively. If you’re in the market for something, tell them the reason why you’re in need of it and how you’re the best person to get it.
Bottom line
In a nutshell You can gain the confidence to request what you want when you are clear about your objectives. You can communicate confidently by preparing yourself beforehand. You should also use confident body language to avoid the possibility of being a source of complaints.
These methods can be highly efficient, but only if the request is feasible. Before you request something be realistic.